Sending and receiving messages

This is probably one of my more obscure wonderings, mainly for my own benefit. If you persevere with reading this, well done you!

Reflection on Reflective Practice

Our training at work has been going very well, and the team constantly amaze and impress me with the depth of their thinking and their willingness to consider new ideas - or re-consider older ideas. There is many things that I really like about my work, but the two hours we spend together every week are very special, and I really treasure this time.

Every week every participant is asked to set aside 30 minutes to reflect on what they have learnt: Reflective practice is something I believe in deeply, and yet I have struggled to put my reflections down for the last few weeks.

I look for an image that represents reflection for every week of our training

This blog used to be my reflection tool, and I used to be very open and honest about my experiences. Over the years I have felt more constraint in what I think I should say on there - will it reflect on my organisation, will it reflect on the people I work with?

I have been thinking about turning the blog private; however, one of the reasons for starting to blog was this idea that content educators engage with needs to be created in order to be consumed; if I only ever consume, what do I contribute? Who do I leave to do all the creating? Will these voices be diverse and representative of everyone?

With this, I am back to a public rather than a private blog; but actually, does a reflection need to be recorded anyway, could I just reflect in my head?

I think that for me, many thoughts and ideas float through my head all the time, and they easily can get lost. I have learnt that for me to fully understand something, I have to look at it from different perspectives, have to talk different options through. For some of my mahi, I find it really easy to talk through ideas and thoughts, especially with my team (who are all absolutely amazing btw!). When it is about this training, I know I can talk things through with them, but as participants in the training, I feel it is unfair when I burden them with the why and the how while they are also working on the what (in addition to all their other work). Right now, I have not found that critical buddy yet who I can chew these particular thoughts and ideas over with, the person who keeps me accountable.

After going around a long-winded pathway, I'm somewhat back where I started - back with reflecting on a public blog; did I just need to convince my head of what my heart (or my gut?) already knew? Anyone else have similar experiences?